ClassicsOne  |  Two  |  Three  |  Four  |  Five  |  Six  |  Seven  |  Eight  |  Nine

One

Who remembers the end of Animal House …. or Stripes ?  Where they quickly show what happens to the characters years later?
Senator John Blutarsky?  Niedermayer killed by his own troops in Vietnam?  Bill Murray (alias John Winger) becoming a war hero, etc. etc. etc.

Well, we probably all want to know what our own futures hold.   I’m not willing to make any promises or guarantees …. but, growing anticipation of this year’s event must have triggered a peripheral neurological penetrating apparition – YES, I had a vision.  As I slept last night, “scenes” from our futures transcended my cerebral rest, sub-titles and all.  You’re a pretty smart group; I’ll leave it to yourselves to psycho-analyze and interpret any hidden or exposed meaning!

Mike Gallickamusketer:  After years of investment handling with one of his largest clients, BALCO, Mike begins to experiment with various strains of the human growth hormone HGH.  Additionally, Mike takes on investment handling for Floyd Landis and is introduced to Dr. David Banner (one of the lead genealogists for BALCO) and together begins a series of basement lab experiments.  In addition to growing traces of rat hair from his ears (yes red),  in a matter of only months,  Mike grows to 6 feet 7 inches, 265 pounds of sculpted manhood.  A Mark McGwire look alike.  After changing his name to Goliath, Mike spends the rest of his life dedicated to chasing Dave Biletnerkoff, mocking, humbling and berating him, publicly and privately, reminding him every step of the way of his inferior size and stature. 

While traveling, Johnny  Galbos is out at a fine dining establishment (if you consider Scotch a whole food) and comes across a patron apparently choking.  The quick thinking Galbos puts down his golf score card he was in the process of tallying, along with his abacus, wraps his massive arms around the patron and performs the heimlich – saving his life.  Weeks later, after the death of Larry King, he learns the patron he saved was the executive producer of the Larry King show.  In recognition of his life-saving heroics, Johnny is given the opportunity to replace Larry King and is given his own late night show.   After endless thoughts of trying to come up with a forum and theme for his new show – he turns to Paul Belanger and Rick Hawkins for assistance.  Hawk is quick to offer a suggestion – let’s just “wing-it”!  Paul offers to bring the scotch.  The new show captures the nation by storm as they adopt the title of “The best damn scotch drinking show period”.  The three of them get stupid every night over their scotch and cigars - entertaining the world.  No topics are off limits.  The rest of the country is “captured” by their success.  3 idiots sitting around getting hammered, talking about everything and nothing – and the rest of us listen!   Larry who?  The United Nations turns to the honored threesome and consults with them on methods and measures for bringing peace to the Middle East.  In recognition for his lifetime achievement, Johnny Galbos is awarded honorary Doctorial degrees from multiple renowned universities and going forward commonly answers to simply Doc Galbos.   

After a disappointing round of golf at his local country club, while sucking down a bloody mary with a record 9 queen olives, Jeff Kunkel is overheard by the 2018 Olympic planning committee chairman, bitching about the ineptness of the Unites States Olympic basketball team, being medal less for the past 4 Olympics.  Taking offense, they exchange words.  After the saber-rattling was finished, Jeff  found himself having accepted the head coaching position for the 2018 USA Olympic basketball team – with a put-up or shut-up wager.  Jeff wastes no time and immediately hires his boy hood idol out of retirement as his assistant coach – Bobby Knight.  He coaches them to the finals.  With a 17 point lead and 3 minutes to play in the final quarter, Jeff is irate about an out of bounds play, where he felt there was an obvious no-call on fan interference.  After a heated exchange, referee Steve Bartman ejects coach Kunkel from the championship game.  After coach Knight restrains coach Kunkel, in an unprecedented move, coach Kunkel takes his ball and goes home.  Coach Knight later writes a best selling book about sportsmanship and his tutelage under “Coach K”, entitled “The K and I”. 

After prolonged use of hair growth treatments, Eddie finds his body is now genetically disposed to aggressive hair growth.  Eddies grows a Tom Selleck mustache, a head full of golden locks and legs that look like they need to be mowed – and becomes an international porn star icon, virtually overnight.  Assuming the stage name of  “long Eddie” (an innuendo of his tee shots ?), he makes numerous films including blockbusters “Eddie does debbie who did dallas but only after she did dave” & “deep rough”, where Dave Bittner makes a guest appearance and yes – finds another “lost ball”.

Dave Bittner spends the rest of his life trying to maintain a low profile and hide form the newly beefed Mr. Goliathster – truly a modern day version of David and Goliath.  He is spotted occasionally in various venues on the Vegas world series of Poker circuit.  He assumes a circuit name of  “Dealin Dave”,  adopts the grunge look, grows out his hair, a long beard and supports a pair of mirrored sunglasses – wherever he goes.  He purchases a used and slightly damaged motorcycle from the Pittsburgh area and gets a great deal on it (although the previous owner did not have a helmet to go with it).  Dave and his hog travel the rural byways of our great country in search of the just recently, now-of-age “Jenny”.   Dave becomes adept at catching bugs in the gap of his front teeth – before squirting them out with his favorite beverage.     

After becoming regular guests on the “The best damn scotch drinking show period”, Mr. Hawkins and Mr. Belanger are ‘discovered’ and together are cast as the new Dr. Pierce and  Dr. McIntyre in a blockbuster remake of M.A.S.H.  “We couldn’t have scripted two better choices for these lead roles” an ecstatic Steven Spielberg was overheard saying.  Mr. Spielberg continued “we were searching for two funny, obnoxious and sarcastic guys, who enjoy sitting around, drinking  from their make-shift still, fine cigar in hand, we came across Hawkins and Belanger and realized – THERE IS NO ACTING REQUIRED   – you don’t get a chance to cast such naturals but maybe once or twice in a lifetime”. 

So ……………….. that was my vision, I’m looking forward to another fun-filled event hanging with David & Goliath, Pierce & McIntyre, long-Eddie (tee shots),  Doc Galbos & Coach K.  Paul, who did you want those checks made out to ?

Two

As the story goes, Tretorns were large Mongols originating from Bittnersberg  under the rule of King David IV.   The Tretorns  were dreadfully feared by the perceived smaller and weaker Gallagherites.

On April 9, 1241, Duke Michael Baldasser Gallectager of Liliput, also known as Michael the Pithy, marched out of his city of Liliput (now the Polish city of Legnica) to meet the dreaded Mongols, or Tretorns, as they were then called by the Europeans. The invaders from the east had already attacked Hungry (under the rule of King Edward Khotyan III). Michael's army was the last left to oppose the mighty Tretorns of Bittnersberg.  As he rode through the city, a single stone fell from the roof of St. Galbo's Cathedral and narrowly missed killing the Duke. The people rightly took it for an omen of misfortune and grave panic erupted leading to centuries of warfare.  Only recently were scribed documents discovered indicating King Wenceslas Kunkel I of Bohemia was responsible for throwing the stone that led to 8 centuries of warefare between the Gallagherites of Liliput and the Tretorns of Bittnersberg. Historians are still puzzled by the motive of King Kunkel I, but late ancestors of the Bohemian King claim, "he was having a bad day" and "wanted to see what would happen".

Michael knew that, only weeks earlier, a Tretorn army had routed a combined force of Poles and Slavs under his cousin Boleslav Belanger V of Scotchkraine and burned Kraków to the ground.  He now waited anxiously for the assistance of his brother-in-law, King Kaidu Hawkins IV of the Khwarazmian empire of Persia, a great-grandson of Genghis Kahn, who was marching to join him with 50,000 men.  But Michael did not know when they would come, and he wondered if he should have waited behind the walls of Liliput for his Khwarazmian allies.  Michael feared that the Tretorns who ravaged his country might be reinforced if he waited too long for Hawkins' arrival, so he and his army left the protection of Liliput on that April day and advanced toward the town of Jawor, where he reckoned he was most likely to meet up with the Khwarazmian king. His army of about 30,000 consisted of Polish knights, Teutonic Knights, French Knights Templar and a levy of foot soldiers, including German gold miners from the town of Pittsberg. Opposing him was a host of about 20,000 Mongols, fresh from victories over the other Polish armies and commanded by King Edward Khotyan III of Hungary. Michael the Pithy stayed in the capital, Buda, but he had been ferried across the Danube River to the small merchant town of Pest when a riot broke out, some say at his instigation.  King Edward Khotyan III, was killed and his head thrown into the street (a later autopsy would prove the King had died of a single bug bite).  The enraged Gallagherites left the country for Bulgaria, pillaging as they went, while Archduke Johan Sabastian Galbonians returned to Austria to neutrally observe the coming war from the sidelines, with a smile, a cigar and a bottle of Scotch left behind by Boleslav Belanger V.

To this day, the feud between the Tretorns of Bittnersberg and the Gallagherites of Liliput continues.  Fueled and instigated by King Wenceslas Kunkel I of Bohemia, Boleslav Belanger V of Scotchkraine, King Kaidu Hawkins IV of the Khwarazmian empire of Persia, King Edward Khotyan III of Hungary and Archduke Johan Sabastian Galbonians * historians agree * one "small" stone (about the size of a modern day golf ball)  has led to generations of endless warfare.

Three

Four

Five

Six

Seven

Mess tees the ball 4 inches high in hopes of providing some height on his drive. He lines up his shot with his powerful forearms tightly gripping his club and proceeds to hit a low screaming line drive into the woods. Mess hits a provisional but opts to search for ball #1 carrying 5 clubs as he disappears into the woods. Paul and I smile at each other and high five. That is when we inevitably hear that Mess has found ball #1 and he thinks he can hit out. With a mighty swing, grass clumps, sticks, twigs and the ball shoot out and the ball buries into a bunker in the fairway about 170 yards out. Mess blasts out again and the ball lands 2 feet from the pin. To our disbelief, Mess proclaims his putt is for par and proceeds to tap in. At this point Eddie says something like "We have a shot to win this hole if Paul and Rick miss their putt". Paul proceeds to miss and a string of profanity is followed by "C'mon Cuz, we need this". I take way too long over the putt, miss badly, and Paul and I proceed to the next hole in misery with Eddies laughter haunting us.

That is the potential I was referencing.

Eight

All,

As we continue to grow and evolve the Great 8, it has become clear that the planning and coordination has grown in complexity. As some of us have shouldered less responsibility than others, it is time to once again evolve and become a bit more formal in the handing out of responsibilities in order to share the load more equally.

Below are the official committee assignments that have been established for 2008 at the Reynolds Plantation. Please review your assignments and responsibilities accordingly and come prepared. We have established these committees using the same precise methodology and protocol that David uses in establishing our mysterious handicapping system. That’s right; we pulled them out of our ass.

Committee: Smoke-em-if-ya-got-em
Chair: Paul Belanger
Co-chairs: Rick Hawkins, Jeff Kunkel, Dave Bittner
Responsibilities: Ensure an adequate supply of quality cigars are available for each and every round of golf. Provide method for cutting off the end of the cigar. This may include a V-cut or a hole punch, or a bite-off as a last resort. Straight cut is recommended to minimize damage. Provide necessary lighting equipment.

Committee: Complaint Department
Chair: Rick Hawkins
Co-chairs: Mike Gallagher
Responsibilities: Receive, monitor and filter all complaints associated with the entire annual event. This position has the authority to decide which complaints are frivolous and need to be simply discarded, versus those that have merit and need to be escalated to Commissioner Belanger for further review and consideration. Responsible for tracking through resolution/closure and providing feedback to originating party.

Committee: Finance
Chair: Jeff Kunkel
Co-chairs: Rick Hawkins, Ed Bittner
Responsibilities: Ensure Gallagher has nothing to do with the process of collecting receipts, totaling, and the ultimate disbursement of funds. Ensure Sarah is reimbursed accordingly and timely for all upfront cash including all deposits and down payments. Track and report on all bounced checks. Ensure all event costs are covered including golf, lodging, meals, transportation, wearables and beverages.

Committee: Designated Driver
Chair: Eddie Bittner
Co-chairs: Dave Bittner, John Galbos
Responsibilities: Has authority to delegate, but must provide advance notice (not 15 minutes prior to departure). Responsible for ensuring Dave Bittner is not allowed to drive to any of the destination courses (including, but not limited to Pinehurst # 2). Ensure any travel to and from any location is conducted in a safe, controlled and responsible fashion. This includes shopping, airport transportation, course destinations and any late night pizza or beverage runs.

Committee: Shot pulled out of ass
Chair: John Galbos
Co-chairs: Paul Belanger
Responsibilities: John has been selected as chair based strictly on a numbers game … more opportunities. Paul has been selected co-chair because he continues to execute with ice in his veins and because Messings still has gotten over the 225 yard 4 iron shot over the water on the 18th hole at Boyne from 16 years ago.

Committee: Handicap bitching
Chair: Dave Bittner
Co-chairs: Dave does not allow any
Responsibilities: Please note, all concerns and comments pertaining to handicaps are to be directed through this committee and will not be accepted by the Complaint committee. Handicap concerns must be submitted in writing directly to the committee chair in triplicate. Recommendations should accompany concerns and provide any supporting evidence that may contribute to your concerns. Due to the heavy back log of received “concerns”, please do not expect any response or action – ever. David please remember, “For when the one great scorer comes to write against your name – he writes not that you won or lost, but how you played the game” – although he does review handicaps …

Committee: Weather
Chair: Dan Messing
Co-chairs: Mike Gallagher
Responsibilities: Responsible for ensuring appropriate weather conditions are provided for all Great8 events. Takes the blame for all inclement weather and takes the credit for all suitable weather. Ensure all Great8 personnel are provided advanced forecasts of pending weather conditions so they can dress and prepare accordingly.

Committee: Morning Run
Chair: Mike Gallagher
Co-chairs: Ed Bittner
Responsibilities: Ensure all interested parties are awake early and get in a good brisk 4 mile morning run in order to sweat out that one unfinished beer you had from the night before … before heading to bed at 10:00 pm.

Committee: Anti-Morning Run
Chair: Jeff Kunkel
Co-chairs: Dan Messing
Responsibilities: Ensure as many Great8 members as possible are excluded from the morning pre-round run. Responsibilities include sleeping as late as possible, consuming a large breakfast that includes many eggs, bacon, pastries, doughnuts, bagels, coffee, etc. Obtaining sections of newspaper and reserving necessary restroom time for required “exfoliation and cleansing”.

Committee: Bug Bite
Chair: Eddie Bittner
Co-chairs: as appointed by Eddie
Responsibilities: Ensure an adequate supply of boo-boo-bunny band-aids are available for disbursement upon the slightest belief that an insect of any sorts landed on or near someone. Ensure an alarm is sounded upon any insect sightings. Ensure we all know where the Benadryl and Eppie pens are located and that we have proper training for the use and disbursement of all necessary treatments … including any anthrax threats.

Committee: Grocery Shopping
Chair: Rick Hawkins
Co-chairs: Paul Belanger, Jeff Kunkel, Mike Gallagher
Responsibilities: Scout geographic locations and target appropriate markets prior to initiation of event. Provide some level of control over eight hungry and diverse men entering a grocery store, walking the aisles and randomly throwing crap into the cart. Ensure a second cart is available for all beverages. Upon arriving at our lodging and unpacking groceries, discover what the hell we just bought and immediately disburse all pretzels, chips, peanuts and whole grain, non-saturated fat, low sodium, cholesterol free, soy bean based trail-mix (happy eating Michael – next thing you know, we’ll be handing out Great 8 wearable skirts).

Committee: Cleaning
Chair: Dan Messing
Co-chairs: as delegated
Responsibilities: Monitor kitchen facilities to determine when pile of dishes is large enough to merit an organized effort to wash, dry and put away. This position has the authority to delegate at their discretion (including putting feet up and having all others do the work). Ensure living area remains adequately free of empty beer bottles, cans, pretzel and chip bags and soy-bean based trail mix. Ensure Mr. Hawkins has no cleaning responsibilities on the evening of Ribs. Ensure place is left in an orderly fashion upon departure.

Committee: Awards
Chair: Paul Belanger
Co-chairs: Dave Bittner, John Galbos
Responsibilities: Coordinate and act as Masters of Ceremonies for Saturday evening awards presentation. Appropriately distribute total purse of all wages, prizes and all Sony give-a-ways. Suggestions include a dozen Sony balls to all participants, TV’s, Stereos, IPods, etc. Provide narration for a short recap of weekend events and recognize deserving individual efforts. Present the Great8 cup to the winning team and demonstrate the necessary levels of humbleness as required.

Committee: Sportsmanship
Chair: John Galbos
Co-chairs: as appointed by Mr. Galbos
Responsibilities: Responsible for the careful monitoring of all Great8 sportsmanship. Responsible for ensuring the selection and presentation of the Great8 sportsmanship award to the one individual who demonstrates the true spirit and passion of sportsmanship (positively or negatively).

Committee: Sandbagger
Chair: Mike Gallagher
Co-chairs: Ed Bittner, John Galbos, Dan Messing
Responsibilities: This committee is responsible for selecting the largest sandbagger of the Great8. Ensures Paul Belanger does not chair this committee or exude any influence on the process for selecting the largest sandbagger. This committee chair is responsible for attempting to draft a reasonable explanation of why David Bittner continues to rain strokes upon Mr. Belanger. We mortals are only left to theorize on the possibility of this relationship …. “Not that there’s anything wrong with it”.

Committee: Lost ball
Chair: David Bittner
Co-chairs: John Galbos
Responsibilities: As committee chair, ensure that no ball is ever lost. This can include but is not limited to, hitting a ball 220 yards near the left hazard and suddenly locating it 300 yards in the right rough. Responsible for ensuring all balls within your foursome are located and accounted for at all times. As co-chair, John is responsible for supplying enough balls to support his habit.

Committee: Ribs
Chair: Rick Hawkins
Co-chairs: as appointed by Mr. Hawkins.
Responsibilities: Although directly related to the Cooking committee, this event is grand enough to merit its own committee. Must interact accordingly with Cooking and shopping committee to ensure appropriate night is selected and necessary ingredients are readily available. Responsible for selection of the ideal rub, the proper cut of meat and has final authority on volume, cooking method and accompanying side dishes.

Committee: Pretzel/Snack
Chair: Eddie Bittner
Co-chairs: Jeff Kunkel, Dan Messing
Responsibilities: Coordinate with shopping committee. Must ensure an abundance of salty snacks is available at all times. May include chips, Doritos, Fritos, funjuns, peanuts, pretzels, pastries, cakes, pies, etc. Ensure acquisition of necessary dipping materials including salsas, cheese sauce, French onion, etc.

Committee: Bloody Mary
Chair: Jeff Kunkel
Co-chairs: Dan Messing
Responsibilities: Ensure appropriate brand and quantity of Vodka is selected and purchased. Ensure necessary supply of olives, pickles, celery, lime and any other accompanying vegetables. Has authority to determine and select necessary garnishments, seasonings and bloody mary mix. Ensure adequate supply is pre-mixed and readily available. Ensure containers are on-hand and ready for golf-course travel. Taste testing is required, has authority to adjust mixture based upon results.

Committee: Scotch
Chair: Paul Belanger
Co-chairs: John Galbos, Rick Hawkins
Responsibilities: Ensure appropriate brand and quantity of Scotch is selected and purchased. Ensure necessary supply of ice. Coordinate with chair of the Designated Driver committee once supplies run out and make the appropriate run to purchase more. Loop and repeat this process until weekend ends. Ensure appropriate quantity is ready for golf cart travel and only break-out once game goes to complete hell. This is viewed as the equivalent of throwing in the towel in the boxing ring.

Committee: Beer
Chair: Dan Messing
Co-chairs: Ed Bittner
Responsibilities: Ensure appropriate brands and quantities of beer is selected and purchased. Ensure proper temperature of refrigeration – ice cold. Ensure travel beers are available for golf course and readily accessible. Proper mixture of bottles and cans is required. Cans for the course, bottles for the lodging. Coordinate with Pretzel committee to ensure one accompanies the other. Has authority to coordinate with designated driver committee for any necessary B double E double R u n’s.

Committee: Lodging
Chair: Dave Bittner
Co-chairs: Paul Belanger
Responsibilities: Must coordinate with venue event planners to review all housing recommendations and approve accordingly. Has the authority to deny unacceptable housing recommendations. Is ultimately accountable for acceptable level of bedroom, bathroom, entertainment, kitchen and grilling accommodations

Committee: Last name plural
Chair: John Galbos
Co-chairs: Not applicable
Responsibilities: Ensures Great8s members names ares basterdizeds bys randomlys insertings vowels ors consonants tos anyplaces ats anytimes. Consults Archies Bunkers ons anys pronunciations uncertainties.

Committee: Golf Equipment
Chair: Mike Gallagher
Co-chairs: Dave Bittner
Responsibilities: Monitor all golf club and golf shoe equipment to ensure acceptable styles and alignment with USGA standards and governing rules body. Mike is to continue with the tradition of giving clubs to Messings (to borrow). Ensure travel bags meet all airline checking regulations … we do not want a repeat of the Roarty golf clubs wrapped in a bed sheet violation. Has final decision making authority on any questionable equipment violations.

Committee: Make fun of Gallagher
Chair: David Bittner
Co-chairs: None required
Responsibilities: Must continue the esteemed tradition of ensuring the appropriate level of abuse is dished out at Michael’s expense. Responsibilities include misspelling Michael’s name, short jokes, challenged and red hair jokes and continued side action skins domination.

Committee: Coordination of wearing Great8 Wearables
Chair: Mike Gallagher
Co-chairs: Paul Belanger
Responsibilities: Responsible for ensuring appropriate coordination and communication of Great8 wearable’s for respective teams. Ensure appropriate dress of both new and vintage “colors” are worn and displayed proudly in coordination of both two man teams and accompanying foursome.

Committee: Photography
Chair: John Galbos
Co-chairs: Paul Belanger
Responsibilities: Responsible for ensuring our adventures are captured digitally for both historic and amusement purposes. Photos should include players, venue, courses and lodging. Photos should remain tasteful, in spite of the material you have to work with. Photos should be posted and shared electronically. Coordinate posting of selected photos with Great8 Website committee.

Committee: Take my ball and go home
Chair: Jeff Kunkel
Co-chairs: Paul Belanger
Responsibilities: Never really been sure of what this means, but special thanks to Mr. Belanger for coining this phrase and sticking Mr. Kunkel with this title many moons ago.

Committee: Cooking
Chair: Rick Hawkins
Co-chairs: Jeff Kunkel, Paul Belanger
Responsibilities: Must coordinate with Shopping and Fine Dining committees. Responsible for ensuring each meal has the proper number of appointed cooks. Oversees the delegation of all main course and side dish preparations. Coordinate with wine committee (not to be confused with complaint committee) to ensure appropriate beverage is selected for maximum pallet satisfaction. Reserve morning bacon and breakfast sandwich preparation for Mr. Kunkel.

Committee: Piss-people-off
Chair: Paul Belanger
Co-chairs: Rick Hawkins, Dave Bittner, Jeff Kunkel
Responsibilities: This is a new committee specially formed after last years TrionZ episode where Mr. Belanger chose to buy a gift for only a select few and to hell with everybody else (Gallagher, Messing, Galbos and the pretzel Bittner). This will not soon be forgotten and is hanging in the locker room and will serve as added motivation for this year’s event.

Committee: Travelling beverage committee
Chair: Dan Messing
Co-chairs: Jeff Kunkel, John Galbos, Ed Bittner
Responsibilities: Must coordinate with Scotch, Beer and Bloody-mary committees. Ensure beverages are readily available for golf course travel. Ensure appropriate steps are taken for efficient management of concealment, temperature, glasses, ice and quantities. Ensure Kunkel hits the sauce early before he has an opportunity to heat-up.

Committee: Sunrise/sunset
Chair: Jeff Kunkel
Co-chairs: Dan Messing
Responsibilities: This committee really has no responsibilities other than to ensure the sun rises each morning and sets each evening. This committee is a token responsibility only. Jeff needs to remain focused, we did not want to overload Mr. Kunkel with too much … he will be busy “managing” the bloody-mary and olive inventories, in addition to morning breakfast creations.

Committee: Sunscreen and Lip protection
Chair: Eddie Bittner
Co-chairs: Mike Gallagher
Responsibilities: Must coordinate with sunrise/sunset committee. Ensure that Eddies precious lips remain wet and moist and do not dry, crack or chap during the heat of intense competition. Preferences include the selection of a non-greasy, dermatologist tested, lightly fragranced formula that can shield the skin six layers deep, guarding against the suns UVA rays. Highly desirable to select a Norwegian formula that contains helioplex to also provide superior anti-aging, roughness and age spots protection.

Committee: Next year venue
Chair: Paul Belanger
Co-chairs: Mike Gallagher, Dave Bittner
Responsibilities: Commissioner must appoint responsible parties for the planning of next year’s venue. This appointment should be made prior to the commencement of this year’s event. Appointments are not negotiable, but you may choose to invoke the Gallagher rule and accept … and proceed to do nothing.

Committee: Frodo Baggins cup bearer
Chair: Rick Hawkins
Co-chairs: as appointed by Mr. Hawkins
Responsibilities: Ensure the Great8 cup successfully travels and arrives at designated venue. Cup must arrive in pristine condition and be available on display throughout the event. This chair is completely responsible for the cup throughout the event, until such time a new designee is appointed. Responsible for ensuring a new plaque is made up reflecting the current Great8 victors.

Committee: Music Selection
Chair: John Galbos
Co-chairs: Paul Belanger
Responsibilities: Ensure adequate Sony appliances are available with a wide array of selected tunes stored and available for our morning and evening listening pleasure. Has final authority on all music selection.

Committee: Rise and shine and get out the door on time
Chair: Mike Gallagher
Co-chairs: Rick Hawkins
Responsibilities: Ensure everybody is up and about with ample time to shower, shave and get the hell out the door on-time. Ensure all personnel arrive at all scheduled events on-time. This may include alarm setting, bed jumping, music playing or any means necessary. Responsible for coordination with Transportation committee, Traveling beverage committee and Sunrise/sunset committee.

Committee: TV remote/channel selection
Chair: Eddie Bittner
Co-chairs: Whoever Eddie delegates to
Responsibilities: Responsible for keeping the peace and governing the sports program selection. Manages our viewing pleasure amongst all College football, NFL, NHL and MLB baseball playoffs. Ensure no Cubs games are ever televised. Decision making is independent of whatever wagers Galbos may have riding. Manage commercial breaks with attention and vigor to ensure maximum coverage without interruption.

Committee: Great8 Website
Chair: Dave Bittner
Co-chairs: Paul Belanger
Responsibilities: Responsible for continued maintenance of the existing Great8 website. Responsible for ensuring it remains current with photos, new venue announcements, old venue history, Commissioner Communications and pretty much all Great8 news. Has authority to delegate as required to select individuals for material and updates. Must coordinate with Photography committee. Empowered to make any website design modifications

Committee: New Wearable’s
Chair: Paul Belanger
Co-chairs: Dave Bittner
Responsibilities: Ensure new Great8 wearable’s are selected and designed consistent with acceptable Great8 standards. Coordinate proper sizes with all Great8 members. Ensure all new wearable’s are delivered to designated venue on-time and distributed accordingly.

Nine

Great 8 Poem